nervous behaviour

[sue g]

can any one help? we are adopting a rescue dog from greece. she is about 3 years old very affectionate and fitting in in most ways. our problem is that she hasn't taken to my 19 year old son. she has been badly treated, so we are presuming that it may have been by young greek lads. she doesn't bite him and she is just petrified and runs for cover every time he goes near her. she does growl a bit but and has wet her self in terror. We have tried to ignor it, to make a fuss of her, to get our son to feed her food, and walk her. But it is not working after 4 weeks, any suggestions please? thanks sue.

[DogPsyche]

4 weeks is very very soon to be hoping for rehabilitation. She's had 3 years of an unknown existence but probably involving abuse at the hands of male youths going by her responses now. On top of that she has had a MASSIVE life change only 120 days ago. It is simply going to take time and space for her.

I think that your son should actively ignore her for the time being. Dogs are more curious about people who ignore them completely as this is abnormal human behaviour in their eyes. I've had many cases like this, where the person who the dog is afraid of is simply trying too hard. An odd analogy (but a relevant one) is that we don't try to get close to a nervous animal like a deer by continually trying to get close to them. We sit and wait, patiently, for days or weeks if necessary, until the animal is comfortable enough with our presence to be curious, especially if there is food involved.

What I think is happening here is that your dog simply hasn't had enough time and space to figure out that your son means her no harm. Every time he cuts down her 'safety zone' by approaching her, every time he walks her or talks to her, she feels threatened and this will not change, in fact it could get worse, unless he takes a massive step back for the foreseeable future. What makes this all the more frustrating is that she has taken well to the rest of the family and I completely understand how your son may be taking this personally but if he reminds himself how horribly she has probably been treated by people his age and understand her fear enough to take a step back it will help them both. It could take months (usually around 6 in my experience working in rescue). Once you lower your expectations of your dog, you will give her the chance to do this in her own time. It can't be rushed.

Some of the activities I've had people do is to spend a lot of time down on the dog's level, again not in their personal space but sitting on the floor away from them watching tv or reading a book and eating something tasty. The dog's nose will often lead the way here and she may approach to investigate (bacon sandwiches are GREAT for this exercise!) but it's important that your son completely ignores her and without eye contact or sudden movement, drop food a few feet away. If he goes to stroke her or talk to her, this will 'burst her bubble' and she will feel even less reluctant to approach next time.

This could go on for days or weeks but eventually, if she's allowed to go at her own pace, you will see her getting less and less fearful of your son and relaxing around him (especially if she smells bacon!)

The bottom line here is that it can't be rushed. A fearful dog can only progress at their own pace and there is absolutely nothing you can actively do to to speed up their rehabilitation. Without realising it, everything your son has been doing has actually been pushing her away. It's all about being passively peaceful and providing time and space. This will actually be a quicker process than trying to 'encourage' her to trust.

Good Luck.